Question Posted by Anonymous:
Is there ever a point that we can stop catering to our mothers (mom and MIL included!) on Mother’s Day and actually just spend some portion of the day doing what we want to do? I want some time with my husband and my kids, but when I suggest that to “the moms” I feel selfish. We usually do separate things with each family, so there really isn’t time left over for me! Do just wait about 20 years??? I want to honor our moms, but it is my day too, right?
Answer from Dr. Laviage:
I can’t argue with the point that you make – yes, it is your day as much as it is your mom’s and your mother-in-law’s. And, if you are fortunate enough, as much as it is your grandmother’s too. Lots of moms to celebrate in one (less than ) 24-hour period! There are practical approaches to dealing with this scenario – spending brunch with one, dinner with the other, with “me” time occurring in the afternoon; even having one the night before, allowing for only one special gathering the day of to allow for more “me” time; or hosting a family celebration for everyone (mom and MIL, grandma,etc…) so more of the day is available for you. I recommended similar plans in an earlier post when the two families do not get along and separate celebrations are warranted. And I also made the point that as a mom yourself, you deserve something special. But however you decide to show your love and appreciation for your moms, remember this – you already share the day with millions of moms you don’t know so sharing it with the 2 who mean the most to you is not necessarily the worst thing in the world. And, maybe you will be so lucky as to have a Mother’s Day weekend where the actual Sunday is full of mom and MIL time, so Saturday becomes your day! I hope you thoroughly enjoy it no matter when and how you celebrate.